We’ve all had some major disruptions to our lives over the last year. I have said many times to family and friends that my little family is so lucky.

No one has gotten Covid in our house. We both still have our jobs and have been able to easily pivot to working from home. We have not experienced the financial hardships so many other families have. As a matter of fact, keeping our children’ out of daycare from March 2020 until September actually saved us a lot of money. We completed a couple of outdoor projects we had been putting off since having workers indoors didn’t seem like a wise decision for our family. Essentially, we are fine.

Sure…we are spending unhealthy amounts of time in our home. One may say that spending so much time together is not necessarily a good thing. We’ve all gotten on each other’s nerves and wanted nothing more to break free of the ties that bind our family together. But we are more Covid cautious that many. We do grocery pick up, Target pick up and Amazon everything. We do not eat in restaurants even outside. We have a trusted babysitter and only visit with my husband’s 92 year old grandfather. He lives alone and I cannot imagine the isolation he must feel. My children love to visit…probably because his new favorite pastime is sneaking them Fannie May Mint Meltaways. We bring lunch each Sunday and stay until the late afternoon. This is our only adventure.

So when I started needing to be in the office more regularly over the last couple of weeks, I was torn. I need to put on pants and makeup. I needed to be out of bed before 7:45am. But, I would be by my glorious self for an entire 45 minute drive there an back. Most of my day would be spent at my desk, also by myself. I wouldn’t have a tiny hand reaching underneath the bathroom door asking me which way a lowercase b goes…true story. I would be able to drink my coffee hot and complete an email without a come wipe my butt interruption…also a true story. I would be able to have an adult conversation with one of the few people also in the office. I would be able to spread out on my desk rather an the tiny hald card table makeshift desk I have been using since March 2020. It definitely has its perks.

But this morning, Aaron handed me Theo with a clean diaper and a bottle. He snuggled up as a breathed in the scent of him. He put his little hand on my hand and drifted back to sleep as he finished his morning bottle. He let out a content sigh and a sleepy giggle as a smile spread across his face. And in that moment, it took everything I had to peel myself away from him.

But I did. I got myself ready and emptied the dishwasher before the sitter came. The big kids stayed tucked in their beds long after they are usually awake leaving me to my thoughts as I prepared to leave the house. Each new transition in this year of unexpected firsts have brought the good with the bad. Not everything was Covid scary. Some of it was Covid cozy and for that I am thankful.

I am writing for the 2021 Slice of Life Challenge.